I have no lid upon my head

but if I did, you could look inside and see what's on my mind.

And the past few days it's been potential. For good or bad, I see potential in everything. That's not to say I have a Pollyanna outlook; far from it, actually. I do not always see things as potentially good or potentially bad. In fact, most times my potential is not given a qualifier at all. I just see that maybe, at some point down the road, this could be necessary... potentially.

My visions of potential usefulness are certainly what drive my pack rat tendencies. I cannot throw anything away without scouring every possible avenue of benefit it might first have. I still own clothes I had when I was younger than my children. There is not anything that uses electricity at school that is discarded without first going through me. It kills my soul to throw away something that might still have an ounce of use (potential).

I see this in children, too. I see tons of babies and toddlers and preschoolers who to me have loads of potential. At each moment, it seems to me, they have this, oh let's not say window, but more of a halo of opportunity... of potential. For just a glimmer of a moment, that child truly can become anything. Then things happen, society, family, friends... and they expand or contract the circle of potential. Sometimes it is things that are grossly unfair, like deadbeat parents, or random acts of violence. Sometimes it is just a thing, like a genetic abnormality that expands the potential.

I suppose this is the one that plagues my thoughts the most lately. I work around all these children who seem to have tons of potential, and I watch all these things go on that stack the decks against them, lessening their potential before it is even realized. It frustrates me to see neglectful parents or non compassionate society turn their backs on theses beautiful bundles of potential. Do they not realize what they are messing with?

I remember this when I first realized I was pregnant with Matthew. I was seventeen when this idea of potential hit me full in the chest. Right then, I knew that everything I would do from that point forward would affect, not only mine, but another human being's potential. It was both thrilling and terrifying to consider. It was then, I think, somewhere back in the far recesses of my mind that I decided to become a full out potential champion. (I did not name myself such... I maybe coined that phrase just now.)

At this point in my life, some fifteen years later, that is what I do every day. I cannot say I am especially good at it, or even have any successes to write about, but I try. I see potential in things. I see potential in people, and whatever I can do, I try to bring it out, try to help it along.... try to do something.